Hey You might set your mind at ease if you check out emergency services in the BC area where your brother lives ahead of time. They might have a warm line where you could actually develop a relationship with someone before the trip who is a consumer in recovery.  Are you in a support group at home?  Check one out.  Maybe your doc could suggest one for some one in your age group or with your symptom cluster.  Support groups can be great for consumers.  Takes one to know one, and what you are dealing with.  It also helps to hear that someone else has been there done that and gotten through it.

Best of luck, have a great trip and stay positive!

wow thats scary...I hope things go well for you :)

<3 Anna

~Writing beautiful untrue things

I'm excited to be on my own next year yet still very scared at the same time...

[AmorVincitOmnia]

Congratulations on moving out on ur your own.....Good luck, It wont be easy but well worth the freedom...

Stephanie

Woah.

Well thanks for the advice. =]

I am still with my girlfriend. Dev........I love her..............lol thats why the tittle was 'I HAVE a girl with lips like morphine" instead of the real song 'I WANT a girl with lips like morphine' so yeah..........lol I am 14, and I've been cutting for about......4-5 years I think. I've tried to kill myself a few times, and so far, I dont regret any of them. Glad all is well.....

May I ask WHY you broke up with your ex if you miss her that much?

AWWW I totally agree with you!! so sweet =]

*Jessica*

First at all I am deeply honoured I can be the inspiration for such hilarious entry...really love it. Now can I make some comments?

What I would reply to:

- Muffin vegetarian: These muffins are made of living animals, didn't you see that one running away?

- Real glass cup: Sorry sir, this cup is virtual, so go to the internet and suck the mouse for your capucchino.

- Suggar guy: Sorry Sir this sugar is white, you may take the other type.

- Vanilla coffee: I peed on it, not vanilla taste but at least is more yellowish

- Coffee in a bag: Excuse me sir, the bag is for you to wear on your head, your freak of nature.

- Small coffee guy: Beat him up. Tell him is for free.

- Reserved labels (to a random loser): Here sir, have one. Wear it on your forehead so people will not wonder anymore why you have no friends.

- Small black coffee: I heard that story of this girl who asked for "wishkey on the rocks, without ice"

Well I hope you enjoyed my comment. By the way, if we start bitching about things we have ammo for one million new entries...

Kiss your cute ass.

Mark.

[lenahan]

Your period will NOT come tomorrow. It would really surprise me if it does, because you are building psychological pressure on it and thus delaying it. What you need to look for is signs that the period is there. The most obvious one is whether you feel some discomfort or pain in your stomach. If you do, good news! your period is there and waiting for you to relax so it can go.

Why this happen? Basically is a natural instinctive reaction. For example, if a female rabbit is followed by a wolf, she has fear and needs all her strenght and energy to run away. Therefore, even is time to menstruate the rabbit will not do so because her body has a moer urgent need, which is imperatiev for her survival.

You are now in fear, so your body is ready for a survival reaction. Unfortunately, your body can not distinguish between physical and psychological fear, and thus applies same principles.

As soon as you stop thinking about it your period should be back. I would say about 5 days after your relax (tops).

Trust me. I am a real expert.

Sad *sigh*...if I could have a cent for every time I see a woman trying to reshape, dominate, control or change a man, I would probably own a few countries by now.

So, let me put it in this way: You want to say you love him, but more importantly you want him to say it back to you. For this reason you get all upset when his [predictable] answer does not match your masterplan.

And then you go making asumptions that he sure loves you back but is afraid to say so. Afraid of what? You already told him you love him, so what he should be afraid of? Is not like he is jumping into the void. He has you all tied up, so why not say it?...oh wait, maybe he does not feel it, dear!

Why women always use their own patterns to define (read guess) men's feelings? This is why you (prural) so many times crash against the wall of deception, because you just don't get men. But the funny thing is, we are so DAMN EASY to guess. If he says he loves you, means he loves you, if he wants a beer, means he wants a beer. We are NOT women, we speak clearly. We can even stare at you without a single thought and IS OK, we are not considerign suicide of breaking up with you, we are just looking at you and not thinking.

God, you DO need to read a bit of my diary dear. Better begin from entry 1.

Love,

Mark,

[ladyofthelake] 

good for you telling him!

omg that story is really sad but true love can kill .... i am sorry for your lost :(

xoxo christina xoxo

Yeah.. I know that he's using me.. but I guess I was just hoping that maybe eventually he'd be with me? -sighs- I like him.. and that's the problem.

What should I do about the other two guys?

quit messin around with the Niko guy. Coming from another guy, trust me, if he thinks it'll work enough to sleep with you, but is blaming race on a reason as to why a relationship wont work, he's using you like a freakin kleenex. Because anybody with a brain bigger than a nickel realizes that, it's 2006, NOBODY FREAKIN CARES anymore. Basically what i'm saying is, he says it wont work because of race? he's full of sh*t, what he's THINKING is "if i just keep saying it's because of race that we cant be together, she'll still let me sleep with her but i wont have to date her."

Keep an eye out

Im glad that your 16th year was great.. That gives me hope for when I turn 16..

I would rather remember the kiss I got from my fiance (Im not engaged just saying) then some random guy that was my first kiss (it wasnt all that good anyway...lol..)

Grey

[mycryingeyes]

i wish you the best of luck

[cooldaddy]

Every day is someone's birthday.

The world's population is 6,500,000,000 and there are only 366 days. That means every single day has to be the birthday of someone. I thought it would be interesting to see how many different birthdays I can find.

If you would like to participate, please come to my diary and give your birthday in the comments (I do not need your year), and I'll add it to an updated list every time I come back here.  You may give family and friends birthdays too.

Hey ya

i just wanted to say good for u and "U GO GIRL!". u probley feel so much happier not havin to lie pr pretend to be someone ur not, finally u can be 100% urself :) which is kool. hey good luck with that girl or her sis lol "gte it there" j/k hehee

take care

~*~Annie~*~

I don't mean this in any offense, but basing your relationship on sex is NOT normal in the least. I know that a lot of people do base it  on sex, but I think that sex has just become too casual. It's supposed to be special, with the right person. And don't forget. There are still many people who wait for marriage, including myself.

And I know how hard it is to not be able to open up to anyone. I myself don't easily trust people. You shouldn't 'keep' people just because you are afraid to be alone. Using people is not fair to you or them in the end. And there is nothing wrong in being alone. Maybe that's what you need right now. Time alone to reflect and think about what you want in life, in a relationship, because the one you are in is not healthy in the least. Your boyfriend is trying to control you, and you don't need that. Don't EVER give up your friends for a boyfriend, because friends will always be there for you.

And honey, killing yourself is never the answer. People care so much about you, even if you don't realize it. Sometimes people you don't even know about. Every life is precious.

And I'm sure your parents don't hate you. Your step-father shouldn't tell you that you are dumb or put you down. My own father did that, but I realized that if people have to always put you down, it's because they are compensating for something, usually the fact that they don't feel good about themselves. They belittle other people to make themselves feel better. But I've found that when they do that it is their loss because they haven't taken the chance to know the real you. You need to realize that you are worth something, and that you are NOT dumb.

I know it's hard to believe, but you're not the only screwed up person in the world. Take it from me. I come from a physically/mentally abusive family, mainly coming from my father, and I've survived and come out stronger. I know you can do the same if you let yourself.

Take care.

First off your not a failure.

Second: any boy who thinks relationships are based upon sex are not worth your time.

Third: Your not a failure. Anyone who calls you a failure should be looking at their own life.

You go out there girl and enjoy your life. No one has the right to tell you what to do with your life. Find that girl. You deserve to. Find that girl and share that love you have deep inside.

Hugs,,,

no ones normal...*hug*

no ones normal...*hug*